I was sitting here this morning contemplating transparency.

Or more to the point, why people are so reluctant to be truly transparent to the people around them.

Is it a cultural thing?

As Americans, we have inherited this sense of independence, and self sufficiency which while good in some sense, can also keep us from truly letting other people know us as individuals.

I am just as guilty of this as anyone else, and it really is something I am working on changing.

Letting people know us, really know us is one of the most empowering things we can do for ourselves.

The first thing it does, is it removes the guilt and shame which we have imposed upon ourselves and our pasts.

We tell ourselves that if people really knew us, they wouldn’t want anything to do with us and this is a lie that keeps us distant from so many people who not only want, but need our connection.

Second, it keeps us from being able to heal the world our testimony.

Everything we have been through, every trial, bump, bruise and scar is an opportunity to connect with someone else,

To heal someone else through our stories.

I think the world needs a lot more of this, and a lot less stoic, suffer in silence people.

Anyone, can feign strength, it takes a truly magnificent individual to show you not only their triumphs, but their tragedies,

To never hide their scars from you.

I don’t believe it happen overnight, at least not in my case.

But over time, I am losing all the pretense and false bravado that the decades taught me to put up in some vain attempt at self defense.

Instead, these are being replaced with the man you see today. Flawed, goofy, strong and yet weak, secure and yet horribly insecure, found and yet completely lost,

And yet never giving up searching for the light.


Written by James Berman

Who is James, or rather who was James and who is James becoming? This is a question that I am attempting to answer myself, and I guess I have been trying to answer for as long as I can recall. I, am Chronically Broken, and yet perfectly arranged. Does that make any sense to you? I guess what I am trying to get at is that although I am altogether similar to who I was and always have been, I am strangely dissimilar from anyone I have ever known myself to be. Much like the roads in New Orleans, the city that has become my home I am constantly under construction. And that is the reason for this site, to chronicle this rebirth, this renewal. To speak to those who are in desperate need of some renovation of all the amazing potential and possibilities.

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